Green

On a rare trip to Ikea a few weeks ago I found a cute, lovable, lonely little potted plant just sitting there atop some boxes in the warehouse.  For whatever reason I decided I needed to have it.  I thought well, little plant, if you can survive here.. I suppose my house wouldn't be all that more horrible.  I doubted, even with my unsurpassed talent for killing plants and flowers, that Ikea employed plant waterers to seek out lost and thirsty plants.. so this thing was basically on its own anyways.  I suppose I chose to completely forget about the Living Holiday Tree last year... because honestly, I think that thing would have chosen death next to being cared for by me.  In the end, it was a rotting stinking mess.  DYING WITH SPARKLES.  I think that may have even made the whole thing worse.. especially since I refused to believe it had expired.  What can I say, a person can only have so many amazing skills.. so unfortunately while I'm pretty awesome, I don't think gardening will ever become my old age hobby.

I am happy to report though that it's not just alive, but super alive!  I have managed not to over water it, or I dunno, look at it to death or whatever it is I do that kills these things.  (note: yeah so probably the over watering... it's not a cat, I should not feed it everyday).

So with the upcoming move I decided I really wanted to keep this not killing it thing going - call it a winning streak even - and wanted to identify just what type of plant this was so that I can see if I need to do anything special when we move to the new house.. without having to ask my grandma to do it for me.  i.e. accidentally kill it, because let's face it, I really rather not ask my grandma for help on anything.  I get enough of her opinion as it is.

Initially I was surprised to learn that Ikea just sells these things, really just selling you the terracotta pot with something alive in it for decoration.. and for all I know this could be an asbestos tree.

My pot is the one in the middle.  Nice pot but really, keeping terracotta live is not as much of a problem for me.  I'm not sure how responsible that is of Ikea, but either way I googled "identify my Ikea plant" and you would not believe how many people are in the same mystery-plant situation as me! (only their plants are dying....... suckas.) So after a lot of searching actually I finally identify that my plant is a Crassula Ovata (or Jade Plant).  It's a succulent and that means it is apparently totally fine with never getting watered.. and actually will start to flower if you make sure you withhold water from it at a certain point.

A plant that loves punishment? You have no idea how encouraging this is.  If this plant wants to be deprived, well then I can do that!  Apparently it doesn't even technically need soil!!!  Just a dish of water and a negelctful attitude.  Perfect!